Childbirth. Isn’t it a beautiful thing? Of course it is. What can be more exciting than bringing another human being into this world. Although it’s a great experience and one that guys enjoy at least externally. Internally, our minds are racing with different thoughts and questions. It’s a mixture of panic, frustration, happiness and confusion. We just don’t know how to feel sometimes during these situations. Women will never know that we are feeling these emotions, because we do a great job at hiding them. Most men like to keep their emotions tucked away because it’s perceived as weakness.

Some guys are clueless to certain things but again we won’t say anything. Why is that? It’s because we want to give off the impression that we know what to do. Nothing bothers us because we can handle any situation that comes our way. Yes, this is my first child but I’ve got everything under control. That is the aura a man projects, but his actual feelings are a whole different story. Listen up, ladies. I know that you always want to know what’s on your man’s mind but he never opens up to tell you. I can’t tell you everything that he’s thinking about but you’re in luck. I’m here to tell you some of the things guys actually think about when you are giving birth.

15. Don’t Stare Too Long Doc

It can be a little weird for a man to see another man down there checking out his wife. Now obviously it’s different because he’s only doing his job but still it gets a little awkward because he’s staring and staring and staring. You’re never going to go up to the doctor and tell him to stop looking down there because he needs to do it. But in the back of a guy’s mind, he’s thinking asking himself if the doctor really needs to be staring that long. I don’t even look that long when I go down there!

14. I Never Want To Have “Relations” With Her Again

Once you see your little bundle of joy pushing his or her way out your lady, it’s a great feeling. You’ve waited nine months for this moment and it’s finally here. It’s hard for a guy to not get turned on sexually by his woman. After all, our hormones are always racing but after seeing your lady pop out your new born baby, that can turn a guy off completely. To the point where he starts to think that he would never want to have sex with you again. This thought is only occurs for a moment because as soon as we get home we’re already thinking about the next time we can do it!

13. How Long Do I Have To Wait Before Getting Some

In my previous entry, I spoke about how guys are often turned off when they witness their woman giving birth to the point where they would not want to have sex with her but only a few men feel like that. The majority of men are ready to go as soon as possible. It’s as I stated before; a guy can get turned on really easily by just about anything. If it were up to us, we would have sex every day. Reality soon hits us when the doctor tells us we will have to wait before we can partake in any sexual activity, which is typically four to six weeks. That’s nothing for a woman, but for a guy that sounds like a lifetime!

12. I Never Knew Skin Could Stretch That Far

The weirdest part of childbirth is probably how far apart the skin stretches. It’s almost like a scene out of a sci-fi movie. Seriously. For those of you that don’t have kids, just go on Google and look up a childbirth video and watch how far apart the skin has to stretch in order for the baby to get out. Guys will just sit there in complete astonishment. We knew childbirth was a lot of work and pain but that seems like it is excruciating. The next thought that immediately hits us is how does the skin tighten up after being stretched so much?

11. My Life Will Never Be The Same Again

My life will never be the same again. That is the exact thought of a lot of guys when they become dads for the first time and with good reason. It really will never be the same again. You’re a dad now and you have someone important to watch over, protect and care for. Before fatherhood, your life was all about you. It’s okay to be selfish when you’re not a parent because you are the most important person in your life. Once you become a parent however you become number two. Your child’s needs are always placed in front of your own.

10. This Smell Is Killing Me

As beautiful as childbirth is, the smell of it can be a little nauseating. It’s just a combination of so many different things. It’s usually a mix of sweat, blood and feces. Sounds a bit disgusting, doesn’t it? It really is a thought that pops in our mind because we are right there to witness everything, but it’s not as though we are about to run out of the room because we can’t take the smell either. So yes we do think about the smell but to be frank, that thought goes away very quickly. Our child is about to be born! Although the smell does creep up, it is mostly an afterthought because of everything that is going on.

9. I’m Really A Dad Now

For nine months, you’ve been preparing yourself to be a father. You’ve been reading books on it, watching television shows that will tell you what to do and you’ve been seeking advice from close friends that are already parents that will tell you what to expect. So with all of that knowledge, you feel as though you’re ready but when the day actually comes and you’re sitting there in the hospital room watching your lady give birth, it finally hits you that you are actually really about to become a father. It can be an overwhelming thought. First time dads think they’re ready but when the day comes that she’s actually giving birth, it will finally hit you. You are actually a father now.

8. I Wonder Who He/She Will Look Like

How your child looks is quite possibly one of the first thoughts that a lot of dads think about. Is your child going to look like you or the mom or a mixture of both? He or she might come out looking like none of you. A man’s imagination can run wild thinking about this. It’s not just about how your child will look once they arrive but also how they will look a few years from now. Yes, we are thinking down the line. Most if not all babies generally look the same but in a few short years they will begin to resemble one if not both parents. So while your woman is sitting there giving birth, you’re right next to her thinking about what your baby will look like when they arrive.

7. Watch Those Hands, Doc

Listen, every man wants a healthy baby. We don’t want any hospital accidents taking place so we watch the doctor closely when he places his hands down there. A guy is not crazy enough to actually tell the doctor to watch his hands or to tell him not to put his hands down there, but we are watching, thinking and hoping that the doctor will not have to have his hands down there for a very long time! Heck I know my lady won’t let me have my hands down there for very long!

6. I Love My Woman

Watching the woman you love give birth can make a man very emotional. Nothing really comes close to having a child with the woman you’re in love with. Sure, getting married is a special day as well and another one that should have a man pretty emotional as well but nothing comes close to having a child. Marriages don’t always last. People are married one day and then divorced the next and move on with the rest of their lives. When you have a child with someone, you share a bond that will never be broken no matter what happens between you two and you will always have this moment. So sitting in that emergency room watching your woman give birth to your child can make you realize just how much you love that woman.

5. I Hope I Don’t Fail As A Father

Many dads have this thought and it’s their biggest fear. I hope I don’t fail as a father. No man goes into a situation wanting to fail and will try his best not to. The problem is that many men out there are not sure what to do and how to react. They want to be the best father in the world but they just are not sure how exactly to do it. So although the moment of witnessing the birth of our child is great and amazing, we are currently hoping that we don’t end up failing as a father.

4. My Life Is Over

I can hear all of the questions coming from the women reading this right now! “What do you mean ‘My life is over?'” Well let me answer that question, it means life is over! It’s just that simple. When you don’t have any kids, you can do anything you want. You want to stay out all night at the club? No problem. You want to jump on an airplane and fly somewhere for a week because you’re bored? Have fun! You just want to stay away from everyone because you’re stressed out for a few weeks? Sure, you can do that as well. When you have a kid, that all goes out the window! I’m not saying you can’t have any fun but it certainly won’t be the same. Having a child is a big responsibility. So those days of having as much fun as you want are over and for a lot of men that means their life is over.

3. My Hand Is Killing Me

Even if you don’t have children, if you’ve just simply watched movies or television shows where a woman is giving birth, then you would know exactly what I’m talking about. For some reason when a woman is pushing, she feels the need to grab one of her partner’s hands and squeeze it till it breaks. I’m not sure why, but it makes them feel good. As a man, we never like to show that we’re in any kind of pain. It’s just not the manly thing to do. So we’ll give you our hand for you to squeeze while you push and we’ll make it seem like it does not hurt at all but in our minds we’re screaming in pain!

2. My Lady Really Is Amazing

Let me take this time to say to all of the moms out there that you are truly amazing. It may not seem like the man in your life appreciates you enough but he does. You women go through a lot. You sacrifice your bodies by putting on a ton of weight that you often times can’t take off and suffer through stretch marks that we know you hate and while we’re sitting there watching you give birth to our child, we appreciate you even more. We hear the screams, we see the pain and we notice how much torture you have to put your bodies through. Many of us are sitting there watching you and thinking that you are truly amazing.

1. How Long Is This Going To Take

Childbirth is a very long process. It can take up to several hours for everything to be done and several days after before both your lady and your newborn are allowed to come home. We don’t want to seem like we are trying to rush you or anything but that is a really long time. A guy can be inconsiderate sometimes but during childbirth we will wait patiently no matter how long it takes. In the back of our mind, however we are hoping that this process can be sped up a bit.