Meeting the family is a big step that can be intimidating for most new couples. It could strengthen the relationship or it could cause problems but it’s not something that you can avoid forever, especially if you plan on taking your relationship to the next level.

At the start of the relationship, it’s normal to put off seeing the family for as long as possible. You don’t want to dive in too quickly just in case things don’t work out. When the time is right you’ll introduce her to the family and she’ll introduce you to hers.

Except, you’ve been together for a few months now and there’s still no mention of meeting her family. In fact, you’re starting to doubt if she even has a family since all you have as proof is a few photos. Maybe they don’t know you exist, either.

Naturally, you don’t want to make a big deal out of this, but you’re now second-guessing the relationship. After all, she’s met the parents, siblings, cousins – all of the important people in your life. So it’s only fair that she introduces you to her family, too. Unless she has something to hide…

There must be a reason why she’s so hesitant for you to meet the people in her life, or maybe she has more than one excuse.

Let’s take a look at the 15 reasons why you haven’t (and maybe never will) meet the family.

15. SHE’S UNSURE ABOUT HER FEELINGS

If she hasn’t made up her mind about how she feels towards you, then she’s going to keep putting off the idea of you meeting the family until she decides if you’re worth it.

Meeting the family is an important step and naturally you want to make a good impression if you have any intention of sticking around.

Perhaps she’s not sure how you feel about her either. She doesn’t want to make any introductions until she knows that you’re in it for the long haul.

But it seems like for now she wants to take things at a comfortable pace, which means meeting the family probably won’t be happening anytime soon.

14. YOUR RELATIONSHIP ISN’T STABLE

There’s no telling how long this will last. Lately, you’ve had a lot of ups and downs and she’s not sure if your relationship will survive any problems you will face further down the line.

She’s weighing up the pros and cons, trying to decide if she sees a future with you. Right now she’s undecided. Are you stuck in a loop of fighting and making up? Arguing about the same things? Resolving the issues in your relationship should be the top priority if you’re serious about taking the next step.

If there are fewer fights and less uncertainty, it will make her feel more comfortable when introducing you to the parents.

13. SHE DOESN’T THINK YOU’RE “THE ONE”

Believe it or not, some people genuinely believe in finding “the one” and it could be that you don’t quite fit that description. She might have unrealistic expectations about what she’s looking for in a relationship and partner. If you don’t meet those standards, then she’s going to think twice about making the big introduction.

The truth is if someone wants something serious with you, they won’t be hesitating. They will let you know it. And they certainly wouldn’t leave you wondering where you stand. If she’s met your family but is still wavering about introducing you to hers, then it’s clear that she’s simply not as invested in the relationship as you think.

12. SHE’S EMBARRASSED BY HER PARENTS

Most people get easily embarrassed by their parents, especially when they get the baby photos out. There’s no hiding from it.

But maybe it’s more than that. How much has she told you about the people who raised her? Perhaps, she lied to you about their jobs to cover up her own shame. Maybe their marriage is falling apart and she doesn’t want to face the possibility of them getting into a screaming match in front of you.

It’s hard to tell what’s really going on unless you talk to her about it. It could be that she’s worrying for no reason and she just needs some reassurance from you.

11. HER FAMILY LOVE THE EX-BOYFRIEND

There’s always that one Ex who really hits if off with the family. It makes the breakup that much harder because everyone has grown accustomed to the new addition.

No matter what you do, you’re going to be compared to that one other person. They will pay attention to the way you look, act, talk and mentally decide if you’re a better match for their daughter.

And the worst part is that you don’t have much control over what they think of you. If they don’t like you, then you have a problem. Sure, it matters more about what your girlfriend thinks of you, but she also values her parents’ opinion. If they have doubts about you and your relationship, that will put pressure on both of you.

She doesn’t want to disappoint the people closest to her, so she’ll put if off for as long as possible.

10. SHE’S HIDING SOMETHING

Now, it’s unlikely that she’s leading a double life, but she could definitely be hiding something. Her family knows her better than anyone else and maybe that’s what scares her – they know things that she doesn’t want you to know.

It doesn’t necessarily mean that she has bad intentions, but it could be that she wants to keep her past buried. Let’s face it – everyone keeps things hidden. With you, she can be whoever she wants to be, but eventually, the secrets will come out and it’s better if it happens sooner or later.

The best way to find out what’s really going on is just to confront her about it without making it seem like an accusation. If she immediately gets defensive, that could be a red flag.

9. SHE WANTS YOU TO CHANGE

The ideal partner is someone who makes you feel comfortable and relaxed whenever you’re in their presence. They wouldn’t try to change you or shape you to fit their standards. They would love and respect you for being yourself, instead of bringing you down.

Maybe she’s holding off on introducing you to the family because she’s worried that you will say or do something that will embarrass her.

It’s a terrible thought, but if it feels like she’s trying to change who you are to fit her expectations of the “ideal man” then at this point it might not be worth meeting the family.

8. SHE HASN’T GOT OVER HER LAST RELATIONSHIP

While you might be thinking ahead, she’s still living in the past. Perhaps, she rushed into things too quickly with her Ex, introduced him to the family, and from there the relationship fell apart. Now she’s extremely cautious about making the same mistakes all over again.

You’re ready to take the next step, but she wants to take things very slowly, and that’s where you have a slight problem. Relationships are all about compromise, right? But she’s not ready for that just yet. There’s a good chance that she’s still healing from her last breakup and needs more time to move on from it.

7. SHE’S A COMMITMENT-PHOBE

We all know that meeting the family is a big relationship milestone. After all, if you’re not serious about someone, you wouldn’t even consider it. So if she’s hesitating, then it probably means that she’s not ready for that kind of commitment.

It’s not that she’s scared of commitment, she’s just scared of committing to you. Pay attention to how she acts when you’re out in public or around other people; does she willingly hold your hand or does she withdraw completely? If she doesn’t like being labeled as your “girlfriend” that’s another huge sign that she won’t be bringing you home to meet the parents.

6. SHE THINKS SHE’S PROTECTING YOU

There might be a valid reason why she’s hiding you from the people in her life and it has absolutely nothing to do with you.

Perhaps, she has a family member who is violent, mean, or crude and she’s worried that this will send you running. Your relationship seems to be great at the moment and she doesn’t want to jeopardize it by introducing you to the wrong kind of person.

Even though it feels like she’s embarrassed by you, it could be that she’s ashamed of her own family. By keeping you away she’s actually trying to protect you and your relationship from any harm.

5. SHE’S EMBARRASSED BY YOU

We all have flaws and ‘annoying’ habits. Some of us bite our nails, others play with their hair, and a vast majority of us talk too much when we’re nervous. Sometimes, you do these things subconsciously, and while you’re not usually aware that you’re doing it the people around you pick up on these habits.

So even though it might not bother you, it might be bothering her. And maybe the thought of you exhibiting these qualities in front of her family is what’s putting her off. If that sounds incredibly shallow, it’s because it really is.

If she’s ashamed of you for being who you are then you need to forget about meeting the family and think about moving on.

4. HER FAMILY DOESN’T KNOW YOU EXIST

What if she hasn’t mentioned you to her family yet and they’re completely unaware of your relationship? Now, that would be awkward.

It doesn’t have to be a bad sign, though. Unless she’s clearly stated otherwise, then maybe she isn’t close to her family, or maybe she doesn’t see them very often. Some people don’t like sharing news over a call or text so she might just be waiting for the right moment to tell them.

On the other hand, if you’ve been together for a few months and she hasn’t even told her parents about your existence, it could be that she’s not as invested in the relationship as you are.

3. SHE HAS HER DOUBTS ABOUT YOU

When someone starts having doubts about another person, it will always be in the back of their mind. They will question everything they say, everything they do, every move they make.

There could be many reasons for her lack of trust in you, but it usually comes down to lack of communication. For example, you won’t know when something is bothering her because she refuses to tell you. In her head, she thinks that you should know what the problem is, and if you don’t then it causes her to doubt you.

The worst part is that you can’t reassure her because you’ll probably be unaware of it. You’re stuck in a loop. If you don’t work on your communication skills, then she’ll keep holding off on asking you to meet the parents.

2. SHE’S A PRIVATE PERSON

Is she a private person in general or is she only private when it comes to relationships?

Private people like to keep everything, well, private. And yes, that includes their relationship. It’s not being secretive, it’s just how they prefer things to be. They’re not the type to turn to social media to talk about the latest dramas in their relationship, in fact, they might not even mention that they are in a relationship.

If you’re the type of person who’s quite open about their relationship, it might seem quite odd when your partner isn’t doing the same. Usually, this wouldn’t be a big deal, but if that’s the reason you haven’t met her parents yet, then you might need to talk.

1. SHE’S NOT SERIOUS ABOUT YOU YET

Bottom line is: she’s not that serious about your relationship… yet. We fall in love at different stages but just because she’s not ready to take the next step, it doesn’t mean that she’s not interested in you.

If things are going great right now, it explains why she doesn’t want to move it forward. Meeting the family is something that probably shouldn’t happen too soon into the relationship just in case it doesn’t work out. As long as you’re both happy and enjoying each other’s company, then you’ll get there eventually. On the plus side, when you do finally get invited to meet the family, you’ll know that she’s definitely serious about you.

If not, at least you get to skip the awkward ‘meeting the parents’ stage.