The Duggar family has been the centerpiece of quite a bit of controversy. It’s not hard to be controversial in the reality TV world, of course, but somehow the Duggars take it all to the next level. Their parenting choices are cause for hot debate. Many love watching the show simply to judge the characters and analyze the parenting methods of Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar.

With life in the spotlight, it’s no wonder there are things that Jim Bob and Michelle really don’t want you to know or analyze about their marriage and their parenting methods. They’ve kept their son’s molestation scandal as far away from them as possible, yet they still have him around the house for family events… he just can’t be on camera, of course. If that’s the one everyone knows about, what else are they keeping from the cameras? Here are 15 things Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar don’t want you to know about their marriage and their family.

15. Marriage On The Rocks?

Despite multiple theories that the marriage of Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar is in danger due to financial issues, both Jim Bob and Michelle claim that everything is fine. However, with the cancellation of 19 Kids and Counting in 2015, and the scandals that surround their son Josh, several sources have stated that tempers are high in the Duggar household, and life isn’t all the daisies of corporal punishment and homeschooling that the show lets on. But don’t expect to see any divorce paperwork. Jim Bob and Michelle are devout Christians, and they aren’t going to end their marriage just because things are getting terrible at home.

14. Michelle Has a Wild Side

I should say had a wild side. Before her marriage, Michelle was a cheerleader, wearing all those mini skirts and showing off her curvy body… to the point her parents were always trying to get her to cover up her legs. In her senior year of high school, however, Michelle ditched the pop princess look, and went for the more conservative fashion, so she could put more attention on her face rather than her body. Her transformation was complete before the show even aired, and former high school classmates of Michelle claim that is definitely not the girl they knew all those years ago.

13. Jim Bob Rules The Roost. No questions asked. 

We all know that the Duggar family is a male dominated unit. And by “male dominated” I mean dominated by one male, and that is Jim Bob. Jim Bob is the master of the family, the rule maker, the enforcer, and the owner of all of his brood (and his wife). Michelle seems to be okay with this, and even preaches that every family should be structured like this. I mean, you, as a woman, shouldn’t have a say in anything when it comes to the household. You’re just the one who grows the baby in your belly, and takes care of everyone, makes sure they’re fed, clothed, and (in the case of the Duggars) “properly” educated. Of course Jim Bob is the ruler of the household. How else would anyone live?

12. Married Very Young

Jim Bob and Michelle were married at a very young age, even by 1980’s standards. He was 19, and she was 17. They met one fateful night when Jim Bob showed up on Michelle’s doorstep with literature spreading the good word. He invited her to a Sunday school. Later, as fate would have it, Michelle started working at a yogurt shop that Jim Bob’s mother owned. Maybe it was all those mini skirts, or how sexy it was when Michelle traded them in for frocks and mumus, either way, Jim Bob was enamored with Michelle, and they admit to acting inappropriately before they were married (but we’ll get to that).

11. A Little Hypocrisy Goes A Long Way

Oh, you better believe Jim Bob and Michelle didn’t follow their own rules when it came their relationship. They admit to being a “bad kids” when it came to premarital shenanigans. They even took advantage of some of the things that the Duggar children aren’t allowed to do, including handholding (OMG!), and chest to chest hugging (no seriously, the kids aren’t allowed to do that). It makes you think of where all these rules came from. Was Jim Bob that into boobs smooshing against his chest that he doesn’t let his kids do it because he knows how good it feels?

10. Subservience Is The Key To A Great Marriage

In a very controversial interview, Michelle Duggar explains how important it is to a marriage that you give your husband whatever he wants whenever he wants it. No complaints, ladies! Your husband wants to play time, your husband gets the play time, and if you’re a good wife, you will give him what he wants, no matter how tired, ill, or not in the mood you are. She said, “You always need to be there when he calls” in references to his libido, and despite your libido. Many people ridiculed her for basically supporting marital rape. She doesn’t see anything wrong with fulfilling your husband’s needs.

9. They Are Always Watching Over Their Kids

The Duggar children are always under surveillance. All electronic communications including text messages and emails must be CC’d to the parents, giving them full control over their children’s lives. There is no sense of privacy in the household (which is already hard to do when it comes to living with umpteen people under one roof), and the children are watched constantly. These communications stifle any additional threat of handholding rendezvous and naughty texting. It makes you wonder if Josh’s correspondence with the Ashley Madison company could have been stopped if they monitored even their married children’s lives.

8. They Still Encourage Josh to Be a Public Part of the Family

As stated above, Jim Bob and Michelle still very much consider Josh to be a part of their family. He is involved in all of their family get-togethers, and they are happy with his sexual rehabilitation results. While he can no longer be seen on television, the Duggar patriarch believes that his son was healed by God, and that is enough to give him the forgiveness he deserves. However, even though they allow him to be near his siblings and engage in family events, they maintain the stance that he is closely monitored and not allowed to be alone with any of the female children.

7. The Sanctity of Marriage is SUPER Important

It’s clear that Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are going to stick together no matter how far and fast the divorce rumors fly. However, other divorce rumors have surfaced in the wake of Josh’s molestation charges and sex addiction. In February of 2017, rumors started spiralling out of control that Anna and Josh Duggar were going to get a divorce. It was even reported that Jim Bob offered Anna a $345,000 house in order to keep the marriage going. As of June of 2017, Anna and Josh Duggar are expecting their fifth child, and there is no real sign of divorce just yet.

6. Divorce is Worse Than Molestation

Despite the divorce rumors circulating, both Jim Bob and Michelle oppose any such action, no matter what the charges against Josh claim. With documented proof that Josh was accused of molestation and that he was a client of Ashley Madison, the Duggar patriarch and his wife are still more appalled by marriage. They think Josh’s issues were definitely treatable by the hand of God, and they sent him to sex rehab, where he entered the shadows, and has since stayed away from cameras. Ultimately, to the Duggars, no problem is out of God’s hands, and that includes infidelity, incest, and molestation. And these problems are nothing in comparison to the epidemic of divorce.

5. Education is Bad Mmmkay?

The Duggars don’t believe in public education, and choose to homeschool their children. This is very common among modern families, but the route of education that the Duggars choose for their children is under scrutiny. It has been reported that their methods of education actually discourage higher education for both males and females, but especially for males. The women of the family should never hold careers and shouldn’t pursue education as a means of learning even more. Higher education has no place in a family where women are to be subservient to their men, and obey their fathers until marriage and even after.

4. Trying For More Kids

Michelle Duggar doesn’t want to stop at 19 kids. Her purpose in life is to reproduce by the will of God, and she sticks by that purpose. So, when she kept trying in her mid-40’s, doctors told her that she would not have anymore children. Far be it from licensed medical doctors to know the will of God. Michelle went ahead to the fertility clinic where she heard the same news. Instead of fixing herself up, she got herself knocked up again, and unsurprisingly lost the baby. The miscarriage didn’t stop her, though. Michelle is ready to serve God’s will and will continue to try, despite the results.

3. Financial Troubles

It is rumored that Jim Bob and Michelle suffered financial trauma after the allegations of Josh’s molestation took flight and TLC dropped the show in 2015. Luckily for them, Jim Bob has many hats to wear, and doesn’t necessarily have to be a TV personality to make ends meet. However, rumors of financial troubles led to a whole crop of other rumors about his and Michelle’s marriage that they ignored for as long as possible. They finally spoke out against the ridiculous rumors… I mean, if infidelity and molestation don’t lead to divorce, why the heck would financial issues?

2. They Believe In Corporal Punishment

The Duggars use corporal punishment on their children. Reports have even surfaced that they use a rod to reprimand their children. While many consider this abuse, their punishments don’t leave permanent scarring on the children, and thus it is not considered abuse in the eyes of the law. Additionally, Michelle claims that her and Jim Bob focus more on praising the children rather than reprimanding them. However, she also says, “if I see the little ones not being kind to each other, I will take them aside and I will deal with them.” Which leaves a lot of room for speculation.

1. Blanket Training

Speaking of speculation… it is speculated that the Duggars use methods from the book To Train Up a Child–Child Training For the 21st Century by Michael and Debi Pearl. The book discusses the use of corporal punishment to keep children in line, and “train” them. Additionally, blanket training (a method of child “training” where you lay an infant on a blanket and smack it with a flexible ruler every time it tries to roll over. The child then learns to ignore all of its natural instincts, and becomes completely subservient to you). Sources for The Duggar Family Blog mention that Michelle uses this practice on her toddlers. Yikes.

Sources: people.com, thehollywoodgossip.com, okmagazine.com, eonline.com, bustle.com